Having a baby is one of the most joyous moments in a couple’s life. However, when infidelity, abuse, abandonment, or irreconcilable differences enter the equation, divorce may be the only option for the couple. The process of divorce can be emotionally harrowing in itself, but with pregnancy, the situation gets complicated beyond imagination.
If you are a soon-to-be-mother heading towards divorce, there is a lot you need to handle. In addition to managing the complex legal paperwork and experiencing bitter emotions, pregnancy-related hormonal changes can make the whole process too overwhelming.
The best thing you can do during this period is to focus on a positive future and take care of yourself. Here’s how you can better deal with your divorce during your pregnancy.
Create A Support System
Women undergo several hormonal changes during pregnancy that often result in mood swings. Coupled with a divorce, you are bound to feel stressed about the uncertainty of your future. This stress can have a significant negative impact on you as well as your unborn baby.
Instead of trying to navigate these emotions alone, seek support from your friends and family. A loved one can offer comforting advice and encourage you to take better care of yourself. It doesn’t have to be your family; a close friend you trust is often better comfort than a relative. Try to surround yourself with people who are good listeners and will help you see the silver lining.
Talk To A Professional Â
No one is strong enough to go through stressful situations such as divorce and single parenthood on their own. There will come a time when you’ll need help with divorce procedures, postnatal care, and even household chores. You can ease your stress by involving professionals like a local divorce attorney, your gynecologist, or a therapist who can help you make informed decisions for a better future.
Find a divorce attorney that you can trust. They can help you better understand what you need to prepare for and what to expect. They will also help you understand the local laws regarding pregnancy during a divorce. For example, some states, including California, will finalize your divorce when your baby is born.
Apart from the legal aspects of your divorce, you should also be aware of your physical and emotional well-being during this time. Don’t hesitate to talk to your gynecologist or a therapist about the divorce; they can help you recover from this emotional trauma.
Let Go Of The GuiltÂ
In many cases, expecting mothers tend to be in two minds about proceeding with the divorce. You may also find it tempting to defer the divorce because you think your unborn child deserves to grow up with both parents under one roof.
But it is essential to remember that raising your child in two different homes is better than in a house where daily arguments and fights are routine. Several studies have concluded that children who grow up in unhappy homes with parents who cannot get along are adversely affected. Keep sight of the bigger picture, and remind yourself that your decision to divorce is best for everyone.
Set the Expectations Early On
The thought of being a single parent and raising a child alone can magnify the ambiguity in your life. Please talk with your ex-spouse about their intentions regarding parenting and what responsibilities they are willing to share. Communicating with them will help set the expectations and lay down some ground rules concerning your child’s upbringing.
Talk to them about the child’s custody, financial support, daily routine, pediatrician, and daycare choices. If you and your ex-spouse disagree, involve your divorce attorney in the discussion so they can guide you in making the right decisions. Setting these expectations will go a long way in easing stress and helping you feel less burdened.
Learn to Ask for and Accept Help
Since women are often far better at multitasking than men, you may need to do everything independently. Like most women, you may not want to “burden” anyone with your troubles.
But the thing is, people who love you and want the best for you will be thrilled if you accept their offer for help. Remember that asking for help is okay, and let people assist you when preparing for a baby. This can be someone helping you clean your house, bringing you freezer meals, or driving you to and from your gynecologist.
Getting separated when you are pregnant is inarguably a challenging task, but you should never forget that you are not alone. Permit yourself to grieve your old relationship and life, and start focusing on the new life you will soon bring into the world. Make sure you have a skilled and dependable California divorce attorney on your side as early as possible in your divorce process.